Dylan's Confession
by Troll99
Summary: Someones neardeath reveals true feelings.
1. Don´t leave me Rommie

Title: Dylan's Confession  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Andromeda or its characters  
  
Pairing: R/D  
  
Spoilers: none really  
  
  
  
"It's no use," said Harper and pulled away. "I know she's still somewhere in there, but I can not bring her back. It seems that she's behind some kind of firewall and I can't break it. I'm afraid we've lost her. I don't understand; wiring is in perfect condition, no damages are on circuits, with one word, mechanically is everything OK. But she somehow doesn't respond to any stimulation I've tried." His voice was breaking and his eyes were filled with hidden tears as he turned away from the bed.  
  
There she laid, Rommie, motionless on the bed in his workshop. It has been more than three hours since Dylan brought her in panic and yelled at Harper to do something about her. Minutes before, she simply collapsed on the Command deck without any reason and since then, no signs of life were to be detected.  
  
They were all gathered around her and sadness was written on each face. Even Tyr, despite trying to look hard, didn't quite succeed in his efforts. Yes, for him, she was just a *ship*, but, it was just the mask to hide his true feelings. In the past years, they fought many times together, shoulder by shoulder, and he admired her for her fighting skills. Eventually, he had to admit to himself, that she *was* a person. Although not human, she was a person and he realized, he liked her not only as a warrior, bit also as a person. And it would be a damn lost if she couldn't be brought back. He turned to the wall and hammered with his hand against the metal twice in his anger and frustration. It's been quite loud, but no one paid attention to it. They were all lost in their thoughts.  
  
Trance was looking down at poor avatars' body and tried to hide the tears that she had in her eyes. She could not see the future right now. Perhaps it was because she's been so busy with trying to figure out a way to wake Rommie up.  
  
Even Bekas' eyes were glistening with tears that she desperately tried to hide. She looked at Harper and back at Rommie and knew exactly how Harper felt. She could tell it by the way he looked right through her with those absent eyes. She's seen that look before, as Magog larvae were still in Harper's body. Instantly she became concerned, that he might do something stupid and moved closer to him. He sensed it and by the way, Beka looked at him he knew what she thought. But he was too concerned with Rommies' condition to react.  
  
Then suddenly, Dylan broke the silence: "Harper, is there really nothing you can do about it?"  
  
Harper just shooked his head and said: "Dylan, I've tried everything. I can't figure it out. I don't know what else to try. I'm afraid that this time she won't wake up. We need a wonder. And Rev, who had good connections with wonder-maker is away."  
  
Beka laid her hand on Harper's shoulder, feeling that he was desperate. Not only as an engineer, who wasn't used to be in such a situation where he was helpless, but also as Seamus Zelazny Harper, who had a big crush on the avatar that was now seemingly dead.  
  
They were suddenly brought back to reality by Dylan's voice: "Leave me alone with her!"  
  
Four pairs of surprised eyes looked at him. He knew that, but didn't pay attention. He just repeated his words: "Leave me alone with her, now!"  
  
They realized he meant what he said and left.  
  
As Dylan was left alone with Rommie, he kneeled by the bed, bowed upon her, stroke her hair gently and said in a voice, that was merely a whisper: "Rommie, I don't know if you can hear me. If you really are still somewhere in this body, as Harper says, I hope you can. You see, I realize now, that I've been a jerk all the way. I couldn't admit, that you mean much more than a ship or a fellow officer to me. I was hiding it in me all the time and was unable to say it to anyone. And now it's too late. Now, it seems I've lost another one I cared about. After Sarah, I'm loosing you too. I'm so sorry that I didn't come upon you and tell you just what I feel. Rommie, I do love you and I can't do a damn thing to change it. For God's sake, I even can't do anything to bring you back and tell you this. You see, Rommie, as we were in Magog world ship and you tried to tell me something, I knew, you were trying to confess your love for me. But I was too afraid of hearing that, or perhaps of what changes this confession might bring, to let you do it. And I'm regretting it ever since. Rommie, please, if you can hear me, come back. I wouldn't forgive myself if you'd die without knowing that your love isn't unrequited."  
  
He laid his head on Rommie's chest, fighting back the tears that began to well in his eyes. His hand was still caressing Rommie's hair and suddenly he felt, that she moved a bit. In shock, he raised his head and looked at Rommie. She was moving! Suddenly her eyes opened and he saw her familiar look of confusion.  
  
"W ... What ... happened?" asked Rommie as she looked at him.  
  
Dylan couldn't help but smile at her: "You just passed away for more than three hours. We all thought we've lost you."  
  
Rommie's eyes were still looking around in confusion and eventually turned to Dylan: "Dylan, I had a strangest dream about you confessing that you have feelings for me and feeling sorry for not admitting it." The instant she said this, she felt very uncomfortable and turned her head away. Dylan remained silent and she looked at him again. This time she, that he blushed. "Was it a dream or was it reality?" Her eyes were wide open in disbelief. He had really said it! She was right! He actually has feelings for her.  
  
Dylan was trying very hard not to look in her big brown eyes, looking at him and requesting some answers, but found out, it's impossible. So he gave in and looked her straight in the eyes and admitted: "No Rommie, it wasn't a dream. I said it and I really mean it. I love you and you can't imagine how happy I am that you're back with me."  
  
She smiled and hugged him close: "Dylan, you have no idea, how many times I've dreamed about this moment. I love you too and I only hope that we will be able to use this time that we have and not throw it away, as we did until now."  
  
Suddenly Dylan pulled away and worriedly looked at her: "Hey, how do you feel? Are you OK?"  
  
Rommie tried to stand up and ended in Dylan's arms:" I think that I'm a little shaky but it will pass."  
  
Dylan lifted her up in his arms and said firmly: "Now, I'll bring you to your quarters. You will rest a bit."  
  
"Dylan, I'm a machine, I don't need a rest!"  
  
"No, you're much more than just a machine. You will rest and that's it. Captain's orders."  
  
She looked at him smiling and saw tenderness in his eyes, which was in stark contrast with his voice. She laid her hands around his neck and snuggled into it.  
  
Dylan went to the door. As they opened, he saw four shocked persons standing there, not believing their eyes. He disregarded them and just said: "Rommie's OK now. She just needs some rest. I'll bring her to her quarters. And no one will disturb her, is that clear?" With these words he left them behind and walked down the corridor with smiling Rommie in his hands. He knew that in this past few minutes his life has changed forever. And he also knew, it was a change for the better. 


	2. What have you done?

»Dylan, I am perfectly in a condition to walk alone," said Rommie to Dylan as he was carrying her to her quarters.  
  
"As I saw you before, I wouldn't be so sure about it," answered Dylan. "Just relax and let me bring you to your quarters. We will discuss your condition later."  
  
She felt comfortable in his arms, feeling his heartbeat. She pressed herself closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. Oh God, how she longed to be so close to him. Ever since she first met him in personae she had been daydreaming about such a moment. But, so much time had to pass to finally make him admit his true feelings. She assumed before, that he isn't so distant as he pretended to be. There have been some hints before .... like when he first refused to leave her on Andromeda together with Gabriel. His look in that moment revealed her, that he needs her, that he is not ready to give her up just like that. And it was surely more than just a friendship. Or how he comforted her after Gabriel's death. She felt then, that she really could rely on him. And in that hour of her worst sorrow, she somehow felt immense love for him. All the others just left her with her pain. He was the only one, who has been concerned about her. She loved him in that moment more than ever before.  
  
These memories were so bittersweet, that she subconsciously shed a little tear. It dropped to Dylan's neck. He felt something wet and warm on his neck. Abruptly he stopped and looked at her. "God, Rommie, are you crying?"  
  
"It's nothing Dylan, I just remembered how you cared for me when I lost Gabriel," smiled Rommie at him.  
  
He looked at her with eyes, full of love and compassion and gave her a kiss on her forehead. "I will take care, that you'll never have to cry again. It hurts me to see you sad. It always had, but I was hiding it."  
  
They finally arrived to her quarters and Dylan carefully laid her on the bed and sat besides her at the edge. "Now you will rest a bit, understood! I'll stay with you. Just to make sure, you don't disobey my orders."  
  
Rommie smiled happily and took his hand, laid it on her cheek and answered: "Dylan, you know very well that I really don't have to rest. Remember, you once said that I was just a machine."  
  
He knew she was merely making a statement, not accusing him. But he felt remembered to one of his worst statements. "Rommie, I know I've said it and I can't tell you, how sorry I am. I should have never said something like that. It's just perhaps, that I was already then afraid of what I really felt for you. Perhaps I was trying to hide from myself. I apologize for that. Will you ever be able to forgive me?"  
  
"Dylan, I have nothing to forgive you. Yes, I admit, I was deeply hurt then, but I know you were under stress, so I don't take it so tragic."  
  
"Thank you, my dear," whispered Dylan and leaned to her. They stared in each other's eyes for a moment and then slowly moved to close the gap between them. Finally their lips met. It was like a first kiss ever; they both explored their feelings and tenderly moved their lips. Eventually the kiss became more passionate and they embraced each other to be closer to the loved one. As they finally parted, Dylan was gasping for air. Had Rommie been a human, were she also breathless. Dylan kept looking at her. God, how beautiful she was! Eyes wide open, lips parted a bit, and face little blushed. He felt like he could loose himself in her eyes. Why on earth, has he been waiting so long to finally admit what he feels for her!  
  
They kept staring at each other until Rommie broke the silence: "I just want to know, why did you have to hide your feelings. I was really hoping, you'd admit it before. Dylan, I love you."  
  
"I love you too, Rommie. If it hadn't been for the Protocol, I'd admit it to you long ago. But I was too afraid, too concerned with upholding of regulations to open myself to you. I suspected that you love me even before the Magog world ship. I thought I have to hide myself behind the professionalism. But as you see, it didn't work out."  
  
He kissed her again and she answered with all her heart and passion.  
  
When they stopped kissing, Dylan looked at her and asked: "What actually happened today Rommie? Do you have any idea why you just collapsed before? It really remains an open question, a mystery for me. Everything was apparently OK, but you couldn't be waken up."  
  
Rommie blushed a bit and looked down.  
  
"Rommie, is there anything you'd like to tell me?" asked Dylan. In his voice, concern and curiosity mixed.  
  
"Well, ...... you know....... actually I do," said Rommie in a quiet voice. She raised her head and looked him in the eyes. "In fact, I do know. It was my programming. I programmed myself to pass out for some time."  
  
"But ....... why? Why would you do something like that?" was Dylan astonished.  
  
"Dylan, I love you so much. I hoped and prayed for years, fought to get your attention, but you seemed not to notice me as a woman. Perhaps it is strange to you, but in fact, deep down inside I am a woman in love. So I tried this one, perhaps last possibility. I programmed myself to switch off. I also programmed the sequence to wake me up. It should be said by you. You had to say 'I love you' in order to restart my programming."  
  
"Jesus, what if I hadn't said it?" Dylan was shocked beyond belief.  
  
"Then I would never wake up again," simply stated Rommie, looking with tearful eyes at him.  
  
Dylan rubbed his forehead with his hand not believing what he just heard: "Does that mean, you were prepared to die if your plan wouldn't work?"  
  
Rommie nodded, with her eyes pleading for understanding and love: "I saw no sense in living without your love. So I made this decision, that it's better to die then to continue as it was."  
  
"Does that mean you love me so much, that you were really willing to die if I wouldn't tell you what I feel? I can't believe you love me so much."  
  
"But I do, Dylan, I do. Do you hate me for that? I really just want to be with you," said Rommie, her voice barely a whisper.  
  
Dylan looked at her, still shocked from the truth. "Rommie, I could never hate you. I love you too much. I just can't believe you were willing to go so far to get me admit my love."  
  
He hugged her, looking in her big brown eyes, drowning in tears: "Rommie, you have to promise me one thing: You will never, never again do something so radical as this. Promise me! I couldn't stand loosing you."  
  
"I promise Dylan. I am sorry if I made you sad or scared. I will do anything to make you happy, I swear."  
  
Dylan kept looking at her and finally said: "God, Rommie, I just hope I can ever make everything up to you."  
  
"You already did Dylan! Just let me love you and love me back. Don't let something come between us!"  
  
They kissed again, but this time it was different. They both knew, that there was nothing more separating them. They shall always be there for each other. 


End file.
